"The One"

The one who sits and draws anime by herself during lunch period.

The one reading a book in the corner of the classroom and doesn't look up.

The one who walks around the playground singing to herself because people won't play with her.

The one who silently prays that somebody, anybody will ask her to (the) dance.

The one who waits and waits and waits for his name to be called for a dodgeball team.

The one who shouts out smart-alec, mean jokes all during class so people will laugh with him.

The one with the disability who doesn't know people are laughing at him, so he laughs, too.

At one point or another, we've all been "the one." For some people, they've always been the one. Others make a career out of it, allowing it to define them instead of spur them to grow out of it. Others take "growing out of it" way too far and become obsessed with "never feeling that way again."  They become the smartest, the most professional, the most driven. No one and nothing will stand in their way of success.

The sad and ironic thing about those people, though, is that often they become so focussed on never being the one anymore that they buldoze over, belittle, and berate all those under and beside them, creating a hostile environment, creating "ones."

On the other hand, I've known some ones who choose to grow up and grow out. No matter how much they dislike someone, if that person is numero uno on everybody's hate list, continued hatred becomes impossible. Even if that person has previously singled you out for derision, it doesn't matter anymore. Because you know what it 's like to feel the weight of everything and everyone against you, and nobody should have to feel that way. Everybody needs somebody on their team.

Those are some pretty haphazard thoughts, but they've been kind of the theme of my week, thinking about them. No one is what they seem to be, and it isn't fair for me to pass judgement, and it's not okay for me to ever make them feel as though they are unwanted or unloved. I don't know what's really going on in their lives or why they behave the way they do. And it isn't my job to know. It's my job to love them, no matter how hard that can be sometimes.